Littleness

Just a little moment I want to remember. Little cups and bowls and spoons and forks used by little hands.

There is such a pull within me of wanting them to grow... and wanting them to stay. Just stay this way forever. The thought that one day all this littleness will be over is so, well let's just say I don't even want to think about it. I remember after Grace was born and she wasn't sleeping and I caught myself thinking "well I guess this is how the rest of my life is going to go, waking up every hour or two to rock her back to sleep". It was inconceivable to me at the time that she would ever change. And then before I could even blink all of that was gone. This time around I am wiser (ha!), okay fine, more conscious. Last night when Jackson woke up and wanted to just be awake at 2 in the morning (I wined a bit) but also realized this too shall pass. And after a deep breath, I reminded myself, I really am in no hurry for the passing, but instead would prefer the being. And the littleness, that I know will so quickly be gone.