Our New Days

Slowly but surely we are getting a feel for our new life at home with Grace away at school.  This week we spent a lot of time in the kitchen baking away (something Jackson and I have always loved to do together). We also went to the park a few times, went for a few walks, played outside, and read many books.  In spite of how much I miss Grace, it has been a very peaceful week.

So many times over the last few days with "just" two little ones to care for, my mind has wondered back to these days that seem both long and not so long ago.  There is a part of me that feels like I'm starting all over again (in a good way), this time Jackson getting to soak up the majority of my attention while Nora babe comes along for the ride.  Jackson has thrived in these last several days.  Not that he wasn't "thriving" before but I feel like I have literally watched him grow up overnight.  The other morning he woke up, came downstairs on his own and got himself breakfast.  When we were at the co-op last week he initiated a conversation with a lady who worked there about the weather.  In the last few weeks I have seen everything from the way he plays to what he eats (last night he had three helpings of spinach/kale/lettuce salad?!) evolve into something different. As strange as it feels to have Grace gone so much, I am very much enjoying this new phase of home life and all the surprising transformations it is bringing.

And my big first grader is thriving as well.  She has nothing but good things to say about school.  She is love, loving it.

Thankfully though we still have our days when we're all together.  I cherish these more then ever right now. 
I think we all do.

First Day of School

This morning Grace came skipping down the stairs with a smile on her face ordering us to "get movin".  Today was the big day, and she was ready.



There were lots of "don't forgets" and "Mom did you remember"s.  And of course, there was the checking and rechecking of the beloved backpack.



There were a lot of hugs and snuggles between brother and sister.  If there is one thing that I don't think either of them are ready for it's being apart from each other.  Grace can't fathom that life would go on at home without her ("what, you're going to the park without me?!") and Jackson just keeps wondering who he will play with.



And I'm not sure Ryan and I were quite ready either.  Although what parent is I guess.  Before having children that is one thing I never could have anticipated- the continuous episodes of grief that occur as you practice letting go of one form of your child and moving on to the next. The days of Grace being home all day are over.  The always underfoot, busy, adventurous, challenging and delicious moments that encompass life at home with Grace- done.  Well save for summer and weekends I guess.  We have officially moved on to the school days of life.



Thankfully, Grace's school mark's this monumental milestone with a very special "rainbow bridge ceremony" where each first grader is guided into their new year by crossing the bridge, greeting their teacher and receiving a rose.  It was very, very beautiful.  But maybe the most significant moment for me was when all the children had crossed the bridge and were being escorted to their class.  As she passed by, Grace made eye contact with me and we connected on this level I'm not sure I could put into words (she's done this a handful of times with me beginning when she was a baby).  It was partly as though we were acknowledging what was happening- that a phase of our lives together was ending- and also that this new phase was sad and exciting all wrapped into one.  Like I said, I guess I can't really put it into words.



So, the ceremony ended and the four of us non-first-graders piled into the van, the ride home a little quieter then the ride there.  And soon I found myself sitting on the deck with Jackson and Nora eating pumpkin muffins (and leaves) and feeling grateful for this new phase of my life, and all the "home" time I have left with these two.

And so it goes.

(Goodbye Summer) Getting Ready for School

Yesterday we crossed off the last thing on our end of summer list.  I'll admit that when I put sewing on the list I had much grander ambitions (skirts, pants, etc.) then what actually materialized.  But oh well.  What we did   make time for (was the one thing that was actually required) which was sewing Grace a crayon bag for school.  She picked out the fabric and I followed the pattern sent home from school.  Cute.





In other school news, I think this backpack is the main reason Grace wants to go to school.  She spent days looking through the catalog before picking it out.  Since it's arrival she hasn't taken it off.



I think we're ready...

End of Summer Part IV

End of Summer Part III... Grandpa Glenn's Cabin

End of Summer (Part II)

The End of Summer

We are trying to make the most of the last days of summer.  Tomorrow the beach...

I Love This Time of Year

The State Fair

Our First Barn Party

(shirts from great aunt Mary Jo)





This morning we are still feeling the high from last night's barn party.  As the five of us (yes, I'm counting Nora's "ahhh's" and "baaa's" as conversation contributions) went over the unfolding of the night at the breakfast table none of us could stop smiling.  It was that fun.

I have to confess, the idea wasn't ours.  My aunt suggested it as a place for all the family (who is in town from Texas and Massachusetts) to hang out for a night.  I was on board right away but it wasn't until my sister and I begin planning everything that I started to get really excited.  But even then I'm not sure I could have imagined just how fun it would be.

There was grilling and farm food.
Smores by the bonfire.
And then (what the five of us have unanimously agreed was the best part) there was the dancing.  Even my Grandma danced.  Looking around at all the happy faces singing and stomping there feet I decided that there is just something magical about a barn.

As I was finishing the clean up at the end of the night after all the kids were in bed I concluded three things
1)  That was hands down the best night of my summer.
2)  I (we) need to take more advantage of this space.
3)  There will be more barn parties in our future.  Lots more.